Gordon Brown : “Lalalalalalalala! I CAN’T HEAR YOU!”

When asked today what he would do if virtually everyone in the Labour Party turned up at his office and told him he was a diabolical liability and it would really be best for everyone if he just cleared his desk and fucked off, Brown smugly replied that he would simply stick his fingers in his ears and shout “Lalalalalalalala! I CAN’T HEAR YOU!” until they all got bored and went away again or there was a general election.

Or at least I think that’s what he said. I haven’t watched the Marr interview because Marr is a pathetic interviewer and I can’t stand to watch Brown at the best of times.

His lying, dissembling, mumbling, grunting, gurning and odd collection of facial ticks – which resemble nothing quite so much as someone in the middle of a particularly nasty Transient Ischemic Attack – combine to form a bizarre parody of a human being to which the very briefest of exposure makes me want to run screaming to the kitchen and scrub the inside of my head out with bleach and a brillo pad.

So I’m relying on the description in the Times (although practically the same article is on all the Sundays’ websites) for this

The Prime Minister said directly he would reject any move from within the Cabinet to persuade him to stand down.

Mr Brown said he would refuse to move aside even if senior Labour figures told him it would help the party retain seats as a general election, arguing that his focus was on tackling the recession and pushing through a programme of constitutional reform.

One of the words most commonly used to describe this disaster of a man in the blogosphere (at least by those bloggers who haven’t got their tongues firmly spot welded to his rectum) is ‘Tribal’. The theory has generally been that Gordon is all about Labour.

He’s not though, is he ? As we can clearly see from his responses it’s not just the proles who can go and fuck themselves as far as he’s concerned, it’s the rest of his own party as well.

Gordon Brown belongs to a tribe of two, there’s just him and his monstrous ego. Can there seriously be any doubt remaining, now, that he is genuinely delusional ? Certainly he’s delusional enough to think that the PLP will put up with being treated like that by the great leader.

UPDATE : Brown is so over that even “government weep rag” LabourList are saying mean things about him

Time and again, we the rank and file, have had to squirm as the Prime Minister’s political judgement has been exposed as sorely wanting

Goodbye Gordon, it wasn’t nice knowing you. Don’t come back.


Hypocrisy : A cardinal example

After the Arch Druid’s weepy outburst last week about how we should all stop humiliating the poor lamb MPs who have been caught not only with their hands our pockets but then brazenly lying about it, one might expect that this was the default Christian position. Live and let live, turn the other cheek, forgiveness and all that tosh. One would apparently be wrong.

And after the very public confirmation of the Catholic churches long standing penchant for buggering children and covering it up, the ensuing media frenzy, and in particular the appalling PR generated by the surrealist spectacle of the Most Rev Nichols praising the courage of the molesters, you’d think that the blokes in the dresses and the big hats would be keeping their heads down a bit.

Not a bit of it though

Britain’s most senior Roman Catholic, Cardinal Keith O’Brien, will launch an attack on greedy politicians during an address in Edinburgh.

Will he really, on what grounds would that be then ?

The cardinal will say MPs failed to set “objective standards of behaviour for a generation” and had “fallen from grace” during the recent expenses scandal.

Yes he did really say that, he really really did say that.

Seriously, how does a man in a dress representing a church that has institutionalised child rape and has been proven to be a sheltered haven for pederasts manage to somehow believe that he is in any position to lecture people about “objective standards of behaviour” ?

Or is that just me ?

Bring a Nazi to work day

Not sure I agree with all of Clarkson’s leader in The Sun but he nails the public opinion and makes a rather amusing point

And if you let half of Africa come to Britain – no matter how morally correct this may be – you’re going to wind people up and gift the BNP your seat.

Then we’ll see how tolerant these champagne socialists are.

When they go to work and find themselves sitting next to a Nazi.

Yes, yes we will. What fun it would be to see a BNP MP sat next to a Labour MP in the house after 30 years of them wailing ‘No Platform!’. What joyous rapture to watch them squirm as after all this time they finally have to deal with the slack jawed storm troopers of hatred up close and personal. What fun it will be to watch their “freedom to think as we tell you, freedom to say as we allow you” rhetoric go into overdrive.

And since they will be both be extremist minority parties, it’s thankfully pretty unlikely that they’ll be able to do to much damage when they realise just how much they have in common.

H/T Dick Puddlecote who pulls out some other gems

Climate change vs Nuclear War

Ambush Predator rightly mocks what the Telegraph describe as “The world’s leading scientists” for their rather hysterical claims that climate change is as much of a threat to humanity as nuclear war.

According to the group of scientists, Nobel laureates all

“It is comparable in magnitude [to nuclear warfare]. With business as usual we will have another five or six degrees Celsius [9 to 10.8F] – that could not sustain civilisation as we know it, which is quite comparable to a nuclear shoot-out. It would mean 80 metres rise in sea level – London, Paris and Copenhagen would disappear. This could not sustain nine billion people [the predicted population of the world.]”

As Ambush Predator asks

Is that all?

No giant marshmallow man? No radioactive monster lizard? No hot hail?

Pah! Some disaster movie…

So we loose a few cities, we can’t sustain so large a population as we’d like and it’s a bit warmer and that’s really about it. There is routinely a five or six degree Celsius temperature difference between where I’m sitting now and Devon. During the summer, Barcelona is usually around ten degrees Celsius hotter.

And while an 80 metre rise in sea level sounds quite bad, should one chose to believe such a figure, it certainly doesn’t match the sort of ‘long night, nuclear winter, all higher life forms scythed from the biosphere, nothing left but dust and cockroaches, etc.’ kind of Armageddon scenario that I grew up having nightmares about.

Perhaps I am just more cynical than Louise Gray, Environment Correspondent and author of this bum gravy, but since there seemed to be such a large disparity between what I was being told now, and what I remembered having been told before, I took ten seconds out of my busy schedule and undertook the minimum possible amount of research available to a 21st Century human with an internet connection. Yes, I googled it.

And well well, what do you say, looky there at the first link. A wikipedia article about nuclear winter.

Now I’m not one to blindly trust wikipedia articles, but a look through the sources for this article reveals it to be largely based on the paper “Nuclear winter revisited with a modern climate model and current nuclear arsenals: Still catastrophic consequences” by Alan Robock, Luke Oman and Georgiy L Stenchikov. A 2007 study of the climatic effects of a nuclear war which is rather adequately summarised by the article.

For a conflict involving one third of the world’s nuclear arsenal

A global average surface cooling of –7°C to –8°C persists for years, and after a decade the cooling is still –4°C (Fig. 2). Considering that the global average cooling at the depth of the last ice age 18,000 yr ago was about –5°C, this would be a climate change unprecedented in speed and amplitude in the history of the human race. The temperature changes are largest over land … Cooling of more than –20°C occurs over large areas of North America and of more than –30°C over much of Eurasia, including all agricultural regions.

So, no agriculture for at least a decade. At all. None. Most of the surface of the earth at or below freezing. And that’s just the climate, without taking into account the additional destruction to life and infrastructure that would accompany a nuclear conflagration of such proportions.

So in point of fact it isn’t really even comparable, by any sane person, to the scenario outlined in the article for worst case climate change. A large scale nuclear dust up would, in all likelihood kill us all and most of the other warm blooded species on the planet.

You’d like to think that such a supposedly elite bunch of ‘scientists’ would have bothered to check the facts before issuing such utter tripe as a press release, but apparently if you’re a climate scientist, this isn’t necessary.

Either that or the bastards are happy to knowingly participate in a deceitful propaganda campaign that suits their agenda.

Either way, is it possible to have someone’s Nobel taken off them ?

Members of the St James’s Palace Nobel Laureate Symposium you are charlatans.

And Louise Gray, Environment Correspondent for the Daily Telegraph, you are a complete waste of oxygen. It took me one google search to discredit this story but you have regurgitated it in it’s entirety without bothering to check a single fact, you stupid pointless bitch.

UPDATE : Bishop Hill catches The Times out in similar cut’n’paste climate journalism here.

Send literally anything you like into space*

You wait ages for an exciting space story, and then two come along at once, brilliant!

Masten Space Systems claim that they

will fly anything you want into space and back for $250/kg:

And this week they’ve been testing their snappily named XA-0.1B-750 reusable launch vehicle.

From the press release

Masten Space Systems completed their first vertical take-off, vertical-landing (VTVL) rocket flight demonstration Friday. The demonstration proved out the design and controls of the 730lb rocket-powered vehicle, known as XA-0.1B-750 or “Xombie”, its internal nickname.

While the vehicle was attached to a safety tether, it took off, ascended a few meters, descended, and shut down its engine as designed. The instant the engine shut off the entire team yelled, “YES!”

“This is the first big step to providing fully reusable spaceflight,” said company CEO David Masten. “Larger vehicles, using the same technologies tested here, will be capable of taking a 100 kilogram (220 pound) payload to 120 kilometers (75 miles) and be reused without requiring lengthy refurbishment.”

The Masten team must be pretty confident, as they’ve already started selling payload slots with a guaranteed 100% refund.

And they’re going to open up the space payload market to amateurs. Seriously. Their website offers punters the opportunity to

Create winning science fair projects.
Build your own mini-Hubble telescope.
Customize your own earth imaging platform.


*Due to the ITAR regs, you have to be a US citizen to pop a payload into orbit. Bah.

SpaceshipTwo rocket motor test

Virgin Galactic and Scaled Composites have been testing the short burn nitrous booster that will fling their SpaceShipTwo vehicle into space. Space fans will recall that Scaled Composites’ Ansari X Prize winner, SpaceShipOne was little more than a high altitude glider with a gert big rocket strapped up it’s behind, impressive though it was. SpaceShipTwo, however, is going to be able to deliver payload to orbit.

From the press release (.pdf)

28th May 2009:

In the desert of southern California, Virgin Galactic’s key supplier Scaled Composites and its subcontractor SNC
(Sierra Nevada Corporation) have successfully completed the first tests of the innovative rocket motor that will propel space tourists, scientists and payloads into space.

The hybrid Nitrous Oxide system being used is the largest of its kind in the world and it will send Virgin’s customers up into sub-orbital space at speeds over 2500 mph (4000kmh), to heights over 65 miles (110km) above the Earth’s surface, before the spaceship descends back down through the atmosphere using its pioneering feathered re-entry system.

There’s tons more video and impressive multimedia fakery at the Virgin Galactic site.

Nuke libertarian gay baby whales for Jesus!

This morning as I was languishing in bed contemplating the day’s work, downing a cuppa and perusing the morning outpourings of the magical steam powered interweb, as you do, my ire was somewhat raised by a story hosted on auntie beeb about a Canadian dignitary.

Canada’s Governor General Michaelle Jean has strongly defended her decision to eat raw seal heart as a show of support to seal hunters.

I’m trying to get the hang of writing shorter, more interesting posts, really I am, so I’m going to skip the sickening way the BBC have reported this, I’m going to ignore the fact that they use the phrases “seal hunters” and “commercial seal hunters” interchangeably with “Inuit people”.

I’m even going to ignore the Animal Rights Nutters angle, save to say that if “clubbing” an animal to death is “barbaric” then you are doing it wrong. As a young chap I trapped, killed and ate my share of wildlife, and more recently have had frequent cause to despatch large trout using a tool known as a priest, so I can personally vouch for the fact that a swift crushing blow to the cognitive centres of a fish, fowl or mammal leaves it dead as a doornail very, very swiftly, and indeed it is only being squeamish and half hearted about it that is likely to cause the animal suffering.

That out of the way, what particularly incensed me was the following

The incident came weeks after the EU voted to ban Canadian seal products … on the grounds that the seal hunt is cruel.

Did they now, did they by Jove ? This raises two of the questions that would, were I not otherwise occupied, currently be keeping me awake at night, viz : “Am I a Libertarian ?” and “Is democracy really right for me ?”

Now no one from the EU came around and canvassed my opinion about the cruelty or otherwise or killing seals, or the fairness or otherwise of

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